To The Boy Who Dreams of Me

Hi there, I’m Faith, and for some reason, life chose us to come together so you’re stuck with me. We don’t know it yet but deep down I’d like to believe and I truly do believe that we were made to love each other and that the day I get to finally meet you will be magical. I want to meet you, maybe soon enough or not soon at all but I’ll wait. I always tell myself that every heartbreak I have gone through is preparing me for the day that I do meet you and honestly, even without knowing who you are yet you have gotten me through some of my darkest days.

Don’t worry, you aren’t insane, though I’d appreciate it if you were even just a little bit. It would be comforting to know that the possibility of me sitting right there in the same bus you’re in every time you leave for school drives you a little insane somewhere in there in your head. Maybe we have gotten on the same bus before, we just weren’t meant to know it yet. I always like to think that the world won’t let us be right now because it isn’t ready for such great love. The world is so full of hate that it isn’t ready for us to come together yet and create one of the greatest love stories it will ever see, it may not be a love for the books or it may not set records but it’ll be for you and me. It’ll be love that talks about forgiveness and a love that is imperfect but true.

I know you won’t be perfect and I don’t expect you to be. Don’t be anxious about your pimples or try to hide your scars if you have any, you can count on it that I won’t run away. I will never expect perfection from you, all I want is for us to be real and real will never be perfect. Tell me everything, all the good, the bad and everything in between. Tell me about your biggest dreams and your biggest fears and if you like caramel over chocolate. You can like dogs and though that would be a problem because I will insist we have cats instead we can have that conversation later. We will have conversations for the rest of our lives, conversations we never thought we would have, others we would never want to have and so I want you to be able to talk to me. Talk to me for the rest of your life and I promise you that all your words will be safe.

We haven’t even gone on our first date in real life yet but we’ve been on hundreds of them in my head. I’d like to apologise if I use other guys in my head right now instead of you but they’re the closest thing. I think of us walking home together, eating together, going to my favourite museums and parks together, we can honestly go anywhere and I’d be fine, as long as we’re together. That’s something I would want our love to always make you feel. That darling when I finally come into your life it’ll be you and me and it will always be like that.

Right now, we are talking about future love, a love we’re both not ready for yet so whoever and whatever it is breaking your heart right now, please hold on, for me, for us. The world is horrible sometimes and it always will be. We will have days that we will fight and other days where it will feel like all hope is lost but they won’t be just bad days where it’s just you, it’ll be us. We will work through whatever it is and we will talk, we will talk till the sun rises if we have to but we are not giving up.

Even though the love I talk about seems so enticing please don’t expect too much from me, I’m just 153 centimetres and a little squishy in some places. I’m really weird sometimes and I’ll get on your nerves, maybe even drive you insane. There will be moments where I might even feel so suffocating and days that I’ll hurt you and even before they happen I want to say sorry. I want to say sorry for every tear I will make you shed and every minute I will make you spend in worry or frustration. I won’t be perfect and I never will be.

I hope you are living life well. Eat 3 times a day, stay hydrated and just be happy. If life sucks right now know that I believe in you, there’s someone out there in the world right now who dreams of you too. Thank you for existing and I hope to meet you when the time is right. Please take care of yourself till the day that I get to do that too.

With Love,

The girl on the other side

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